Please stop stealing our men! We are only a small island, and a large share of our few single men either have horrid teeth or are poofs. We do NOT need you coming over here, "studying abroad" for your MRS degrees, taking the few eligible men back home with you. Or worse, settling here and rubbing our noses in your wedded bliss. Please settle for your own Clooneys, Pitts, and Damons. I'm in talks with immigration leaders about revoking your visas, particularly should you be a size zero. (UK 2, because honestly, what is a zero? Do you exist or not?)
Sincerely,
Bridget
PS - It's not "quaint" when you say things like "lift" and "flat."
PPS - EAT SOMETHING!
cc: Immigration leaders
super like
ReplyDeletehilarious. it won't stop me though!
ReplyDeleteI feel we are exempt somehow, even though I am clearly mocking myself in the picture.... For the record, I would settle for my own Damon if that was a viable option.
ReplyDelete