Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Reviewing: If I'm So Wonderful, Why Am I Still Single?

To start off, oy, what have I gotten myself into?  How am I going to read one of these books a week for the rest of the year and stay sane?  Answer:  Is Bridget sane?  Moving on...

This one was very clinical and a bit out of date.  Originally published in 1988, it has been revised to include "the internet" as a new invention, but only in the most minimal ways.  It's truly a "self-help" book in that it was giving tips on looking inside yourself for the answers.  It starts with making a list of all the reasons you think you're single, then over the course of the book, you're taught how to "zap" them and realize they are excuses.

There are 10 strategies listed for this:
1 - Examine your hidden ambivalence.
2 - Ignore the dreaded statistics.
3 - Abandon the myth that there are no good ways to meet people.
4 - Keep your high standards.
5 - Don't get stuck - learn to say no. 
6 - Distinguish between Pseudo-intimacy and the real thing.
7 - Avoid commitment-phobes (Bridget approves!)
8 - Don't try to make anyone love you.
9 - Overcome your own commitment issues.
10 - Increase your self-awareness and self-esteem.

I mentioned how clinical this was, right?  The last thing it suggests is to form a "Make it Happen" self-help group.  Wow.  Is that what Bridget's urban family is?  If you ask me, they are the anti-"Make it Happen" group.  They enjoy each other's misery, since after all, misery does love company.  Not to make them sound like selfish jerks, but they are a tad selfish jerkish.  In the book, when Bridget thinks Tom might be dead, she imagines what the funeral will be like and also thinks it's wonderful that everyone is coming to her for updates as his "closest friend."  Shiver, I hope my friends don't envision those things.

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