Friday, December 10, 2010

Smug Marrieds' Divorce Ratio vs. True Love

*None of my friends are smug marrieds.  So when I talk about smug marrieds, I am NOT talking about you, reader.  Unless I don't know you, in which case....I'm going to go out on a limb and say I'm most likely not.

There's a year in your life when everyone got married.  Think back to it.  Think of how many weddings you went to that year, and how every wedding seemed to be the culmination of years of planning, but seemingly as little thought to the intended spousal choice as to what color toothbrush you pick.  It was the next step, and nobody gave much thought to it.  When you did go to a wedding where the bride and groom were truly in love (not where there was an ultimatum, a shot gun, or a "well, I guess we outta make this thing legal"), it was remarkably refreshing.  Proposal stories that didn't begin with "she was giving hints, left the Tiffany catalog lying around" were as rare as rainy days in LA.

How many of those couples are divorced now?  Now, think of that as a ratio.  Is it 1 in 3, as Mark Darcy says?  If it's not, wait a year.

Maybe this seems negative.  It's not intended to be.  I refuse to be discouraged by divorce just as Bridget does.  That's because Bridget and I know what we're looking for, and we know when we find it, it will last.  We believe in a thing called love.

While Bridget knows she wants to get married more than anything, she also knows that there's a danger of becoming a smug married.  That's the last thing she wants.  While some friends say just to fake a pregnancy, she would never.  Instead, she worries very much when she's late and never tells either Daniel or Mark of her pregnancy worries.  (Ok, Mark does catch her in the act.)  She longs for true love.  True, committed, soul-mate love.  She'd rather be single forever rather than marry someone who doesn't really want to be with her.  And guess what.  She finds what she's looking for.  Doesn't get much more positive than that!

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